Evening Illusions

I finally bought Alice in Wonderland yesterday.

As I was driving home tonight, I could have sworn the horizontal crescent of the moon rotated slightly when I looked at it.

I was just waiting for the Cheshire Cat to appear and smile at me.

Unfortunately, when I checked my passenger seat, Johnny Depp was not there, nor was a pot of tea.

Damn.

The Hell, Man

Sometimes in life, there are moments. Moments in which the only thing that you can possibly think of to say is "Umm, what the fuck?"

But don't be fooled by the angry appearance of that last word. These can often be good moments. So, to disguise the fact the fuck looks angry and makes people think that I am yelling in frustration rather than joy, we will simplify.

Here are some wtf? moments from the last couple days:

wtf? Moment 1.

I had a girl yesterday tell me I give the best advice ever. Her conundrum? She hooked up with her best friend one too many times, and now they were on the verge of not being friends. Which she just couldn't bear.

My solution?

Stop screwing your friends.

She thanked me profusely. Umm, the hell?


wtf? Moment 2.

I was legitimately wondering what good karma I possibly could have earned yesterday. Within the time span of an hour, I got a job,

YAY!

AND I got tickets to go see Rise Against / Bad Religion at the Fillmore.

Which is so freaking sick.

SO. SICK.

I must have done something really nice to deserve that. And I don't do nice things. I don't understand.

wtf? Moment 3.

At about ten o' clock, I got a text from my ex-boyfriend. It said, and I quote:

"Happy break up anniversery. :) hope your doing well Emma, and i hope the play went well!"

Nice grammar, douche.

Need I say why the only thing that I could think of to say for about an hour after I got it was dude, what the fuck?

I mean, come on. Who says shit like that? Come on, man. Come on.

Final moment came this morning. Surprisingly, from the same source which the first one came from. Golly, she sure is a bundle of accidental entertainment these days.    

One question I never thought I would hear while sitting in the hallway talking to my friends is "Hey Emma, do you have a gameboy charger?"

....the fuck?

No, I don't have a gameboy charger. Maybe because I'm a big kid now, and I don't play Zelda in the hallway during passing periods. Or maybe it's because I just forgot to bring my charger with me to school today.

Or hey, maybe it's because they went out of style FIVE YEARS AGO.

Which I informed her of. Politely, of course.

I'm always polite.

After I finish laughing.

I Own My Soul Again

Hello, blog. It's been a while.

My life took on a new name this past few weeks.

And that name was Oklahoma.

It was quite the roller coaster ride.

I learned a lot. Made some new friends. Discovered some stuff about myself.

Oh, yeah, and had a shit ton of fun.

I miss my new friends already. Good thing we're going to have nightly Oklahoma skype sessions. Because it's a little tough to go from seeing somebody for at least five hours a day to not seeing them at all. Sniff.

I found out that I have really high expectations for myself. Like, more so than I already knew. Almost bordering on the obscene.

Overall, it was a fabulous experience. I already can't wait for next year's musical.

Good news for you all?

I'm baaaaaack. :]

Just Give Me Chocolate

Valentine's Day is tomorrow.

I'm going on a facebook strike.

Because the majority of the population seems to feel the need to express their love via a status update, making it less of a personal interaction and more of a public broadcast of how much of an sappy nymph they are.

And in case you didn't know, nymphs are very sappy.

Because I said so.

Therefore, a nymph is sappy.

Take that, fantasy genre.

So for the entirety of the day tomorrow, I am not going to open my facebook at all. Because if I see my news feed riddled with, and I quote, "i love my baby sooo muchhhh you're the best babe happy valentines day <3<3<3<3<3" I think I will throw up.

Scratch that, I know I will.

Instead, I will be perfectly happy sitting in my basement, eating massive quantities of vegetables (aka chocolate), and watching sappy movies.

That should do nicely.

Think Nasty, Think Nasty

I hate people.

I usually have mean thoughts about them.

Sometimes I try not to say them out loud.

My walk home from school today was accompanied by a nice long rant about the kid who lives down the street from me.

It went somewhat like this:

I hate you. I hate you so much. Every time I hear your stupid cowboy boots click on the pavement I hate you. I hate your jacket. No, it's not even a jacket. It's a fucking trench coat. I hate it. P.S. It's the 21st century. And it's not wartime in America. Put your stupid trench coat back. I hope you realize how stupid you look. Because you look stupid. And I hate you.


On the bright side, I had a good long conversation with my teacher in French today. I felt competent. And it made me smile.

Oh, and they call the wind Maria.

That makes me smile too.

All Stateeee

Is going to be so. Much. Fun.

I'm super jazzed.

But it's funny. Because while I'm super excited and I know that it will be a blast, I'm nervous too.

I feel like it's my first day of elementary school or something.

Will the other kids like me? What if I don't fit in? I hope I wear the right shoes...

I mean, you never know what those other kids will be like. What if the bullies steal my lunch money?!

But really. I have no idea what to expect.

It's always interesting going to district-wide, or in this case, state-wide things. Because you can see all of the different fashions from all of the different schools, and everybody has their friends that they know, but at the same time they're thrown in with a bunch of people that they don't. It's an adventure to see who will end up talking to who, and how the new friend groups will form.

I just hope that we all get along. I mean, with a women's choir of around 100 people, it would be a nightmare to try and put us all in time-out.

I don't think we would all fit in the corner.

Good Ol' Chipotel

I love Chipotle. Even though a lot of people seem to have troubles pronouncing its name. Chipotel, Chipolte, whatever. I still love it.

Because even today, on this coldest of cold days, they still love us.

If you order four or more burritos online and then go into the store to pick it up, not only do they only make you pay for half of it (aka 50% for those of you who are numerically challenged), but they also throw in a cup o' soup for those poor saps who have to go trudge out in the cold and pick up food for their families.

So, guess what I had for dinner?

I Love You, White Fluff

Snow is magic.

Not because I like it. In fact, I rather dislike it.

But because there is not a single other element of nature that can get high schoolers quite so giddy in such a short amount of time.

My neighbor got sentenced to shoveling the driveway because her excitement level of screaming and running around the house exceeded her family's tolerance level.

What did I tell you? Magic.

Wow, Blogger. You're Smart.

So I was looking at the page design editor.

And in the preview that they have to show you what your blog post will look like, they have this.

Lorem ipsum vim ut utroque mandamus intellegebat, ut eam omittam ancillae sadipscing, per et eius soluta veritus.


I put it in Google translate. It means: 


This force, that we command both observing that, in order that she say nothing ofsadipscing handmaid, and then give us his loosed the truth.


Blogger is smart.

R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Some actors are great on-screen, but not in real life. Some are very admirable people, but not so much as actors. But my favorites are the ones who are great on the screen, and then turn around and are just as great in their everyday life.

"I admire actors and artists who devote just as much time to their life as they do to their work."

Perfect quote by Jake Gyllenhaal. Who, by the way, is one of those few individuals that I have that level of respect for. He is a fabulous actor, and though regrettably I haven't seen him in much, he commands the screen, and may I say he's not unpleasant to look at either.

I saw this on facebook this morning and it just made a little smile creep onto my face. Ashton Kutcher is another one of my favorites, and it's a video of him and his step-daughter. They were just messing around and wrote a song and decided to share it. And even though that's tiny, it seemed to me such a character-boosting occurrence.

Acting is nothing less than a demanding career, and many of the people who enter into it end up getting so swept up into the world of it all that they turn into workaholic zombies who care for nothing but publicity.

Which is why whenever I see an actor or actress with a normal, loving marriage, or a family of their own, or anything else that shows they are devoted to their life as well as they work, they become just that much more revered in my mind.

Take Eric Bana, for instance. He's an amazing actor, and yet, instead of giving all of his time to movies, he opts to stay in Australia with his family for up to a year or two at a time.

In such a demanding industry, the existence of people who can balance their work life and their home life in such a way as to keep their decency as a human being without being any less of a contribution to their industry is incredibly freeing and reassuring.

Nicole Kidman is happily married. Sandra Bullock has adopted children. Even Brad and Angelina are a cute little family, despite their common appearances in the limelight. I mean, did you see them at the Golden Globes? Adorable.

Unfortunately, though, they are rare jewels in the movie world.

Don't even get me started on the assholes.